You know there is a song that states "I wish that you could see me now cause I'm not who I was", and I just love to sing along with it because I am so thankful that I am not who I once was. I am changed.
Was I a horrible person, nope. I was a broken and sad person looking to fill an abyss of lonliness and self-pity . I had no hope and no way to process life, no ability to make good decisions and I lived by what I felt.
Today I can say that ,while I want to keep that season of my life close by, I can always be reminded of where I once was. I am so thankful that I have a God that wept with me when I was lost and pursued me intensely until I could hear His voice. A God that loves me enough to let me choose and also to let me suffer my own consequences. A God that does not promise a life without brokenness or pain but, a promise that whatever may come, He will not leave. In fact He will use it for our good IF we allow it.
Yes, I am so full of joy with every breath I take that I am not who I once was cause I like me now. I am not perfect, I sin, I disappoint and I fail but, now I know that there is more to my story than that.
Was I a horrible person, nope. I was a broken and sad person looking to fill an abyss of lonliness and self-pity . I had no hope and no way to process life, no ability to make good decisions and I lived by what I felt.
Today I can say that ,while I want to keep that season of my life close by, I can always be reminded of where I once was. I am so thankful that I have a God that wept with me when I was lost and pursued me intensely until I could hear His voice. A God that loves me enough to let me choose and also to let me suffer my own consequences. A God that does not promise a life without brokenness or pain but, a promise that whatever may come, He will not leave. In fact He will use it for our good IF we allow it.
Yes, I am so full of joy with every breath I take that I am not who I once was cause I like me now. I am not perfect, I sin, I disappoint and I fail but, now I know that there is more to my story than that.
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