Why I share openly...

A few years back, when my children were younger, my eldest, was in middle school. He had a very good friend and that friend's and I's mother became acquaintances. We took the boys to the pool one day and I shared my testimony... wholly, brutally, honestly and fully open for probably, one of the first times ever, to somebody outside of my church. This was raw and probably too much detail but, I was excited and happy to share the transformation that God has done in my life...I AM NOT WHO I ONCE WAS.

Fast forward a few weeks and I get a call from that same family asking us to come over, they had something to discuss with us. My husband and I agreed and we went over. We sat down at the table and they began to tell us that our son had stolen money from them. Before we could speak they said, since my testimony, that I shared, spoke to that that... they knew my son had stolen the money. They judged my son by MY testimony and I began to weep. I mean, I can't say have wept a lot in my life or if ever...but, I wept. As I sat there trying to contain my sobs, my husband grew more tense. As soon as they were done speaking, There was not a rebuttal...I could not speak and to be honest, my husband was about ready to punch somebody. They wanted to end in prayer so we prayed and we left. 

I could barely breathe from trying to choke down the complete devastation I felt. As I got in the car, my first words between my sobs were, "I will never ever share my story again. If this is what it feels like to be transparent and share my testimony freely... I want no part of it". My sweet, wise, husband took my hand; looked me straight in the face and said, "no this is why you will continue to share your story. If you share your story... what people do with that is out of your control. If you are called to share what God has done in you...it is not about you, you are redeemed, it is about them".

Why did I choose to write about this today? God's reminder to me is...I got a job where I have to pass their house every single day. Driving by, it reminds me of that time although it's still painful and has brought me to tears sometimes, it's a different pain, a kind of righteously angry pain. I have compassion for that family but, I will never understand their judgement of my son based on a story I told of God's love for me.

I just thought maybe somebody needed to hear it, maybe even you. We are called to testify, not for us but, for others. I have shared my story openly many times but, the lesson that first time...gave me a strength I may not have had without that experience.